My Children are Learning to Protect

The dog picture will make sense at the end. Or maybe it won't. Let's just say that Jack riding in the back of the bike trailer was one of many highlights to this glorious day!

My children know me. They know my sin. They know my weakness. For a long time I tried to hide my imperfection from them as I thought that the only hope for my children to be perfect was for me to provide a perfect model for them. Anyone who has tried to do this knows how perfectly exhausting and ineffective it is. All it takes is a jam jar falling out the fridge to allow those carefully hidden words to come flying out. Sometimes it takes even less than that!

So, today comes yet another confession to you , my dear readers. I struggle mightily with the 10th commandment. Yeah, that one about coveting. The problem with this commandment is that it is awfully sneaky. I don't want a lot of things and most of the time am very happy when my friends get great things. I've rejoiced with incredible jobs found and dream vacations for my friends. BUT, there are some day and times when I am so NOT able to do this. I've been in lovely houses owned by lovely people where all I've wanted to do was run out and cry because I wanted what they had so much and knew that I would never have a house like theirs. I've listened to people list accomplishments and not been able to come even close to rejoicing. I have to admit to having some not so nice thoughts at times.

And yes, my kids know about this. I especially struggle with one person in my life who seems to get everything I think I want. We were at the person's house today and he wanted to show us yet another of his toys for their lake cabin. I cringed inside, knowing that looking at this toy would just wreck my day. As we got back into the car, I was ready with all kinds of critical words about this person and his family. I didn't feel at all about talking to God about this . . . to use a quote I wrote in here eariler this week, I was ready to give the devil a nice long ride.

Jonathan, knowing my distress and weakness in this area, spoke first. His words showed an incredible love to me. He said with absolutely no critisim in his voice (I would know if it was there), "Wow Mom . . . It's like they are building an amusement park up north." I started to smile. He went on to describe this amusement park and what it would look like and how much fun it would be to enjoy playing there this summer. By the time he was done, I was laughing as I enjoyed this picture he was creating. His uncritical humor was like a lifeline out of the jealousy and envy that were seeking to drown me in misery.

And as if by unconscious decree, all four children continued to surround me for the rest of the day with an incredible gift. Their presence. Childish. Free. Loving. Gracious. Laughing. We went on a bike ride that was a comedy of errors from start to finish. Starting with bringing Jack the wonderdog who did NOT want to be in the trailer (what were we thinking?) and ending with Jonathan leaving all his tackle alongside the bike trail and not realizing it until we were home (a place for me to show a little protective love of my own!), the day had more than its share of memories. But, we laughed so hard today. It was a Philippians 4:8 kind of day:

Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.

While there were struggles along the way, we all seemed to be able to point ourselves back to living in a place where we could think beautiful things about each other. Our new natures were certainly wooed today. I'm so incredibly blessed to be able to do life with these precious people. I love you Jonathan, Andrew, Caleb, Rachel, and Brit!

Thank you Papa for putting us together in this life.